When Jesus came to the world, he did not come to a blameless people. He went right to the broken, asking Himself: what can I do to serve them? His interactions were sacrificial in nature, echoing God’s sacrificial love for us. God did not come to a perfect world, but to restore perfection in the world. And to this day, He patiently walks with us, guiding us to be more loving, kind, and present with our neighbors. God’s love is not one of rejection, but of community: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). In this article, I want to address what God says about relationships, including His thoughts about the power of mercy and the dangers of rejection.

 

Ephesians 2:8 Via Pinterest

 

A Look Into The Nature of Rejection

“Whoever comes to me I will never drive away.”

John 6:37

 

Ouch! We’ve all been there. Rejected in one way or another, for the way we look, how we act, or for the values we hold dear. Rejection hurts, and rightfully so. We’re hardwired to seek social connection, so rejection can feel worse than death. The question is: if it feels so bad on the receiving end, why do humans insist on perpetuating it?

Rejection in a biblical sense refers to the experience of being unwanted or disregarded by others. Even Jesus faced rejection: “He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief” (Isaiah 53:3). Jesus did not fit the religious leaders’ preconceived ideas of a messiah, so he was crucified on the cross.

 

“Cross By the Sea Side” Via Pinterest

 

God understands the pain of rejection and does not wish it on His people. In the Bible, we hear many cautionary verses related to pride, a primary cause of rejection:

• Psalm 101:5: “Whoever slanders their neighbor in secret, I will put to silence; whoever has haughty eyes and a proud heart, I will not tolerate.” 
• Proverbs 11:2: “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.”
• Proverbs 13:10: “By pride comes nothing but strife.”
• James 4:6: “But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: ‘God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble’.”
• Romans 12:16: “Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.”

Pride is a powerful emotion that produces division. Both minor gossip and severe discrimination are fruits of the same evil spirit: the errant belief that we, in one way or another, are superior to our neighbors. This belief system is biblically discouraged.

In a world where it’s far too easy to reject others, how can we be more like God? Well, we can start by leaving our assumptions of others at the door. After all, how can we know the full truth? “Humans look at outward appearances, but the LORD looks into the heart.” God encourages us to to be “quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger” for this very reason. Too often, we don’t give each other the benefit of the doubt!

Jesus was an expert at looking past what others would reject. He dismantled the labels around people –– leper, widow, orphan, prostitute, tax collector –– and looked at the heart. In kind, people gravitated towards him, seeking His redemption in their lives.

While we may think our reasons for rejecting people are fair, we are missing the fundamental lesson in Jesus’ coming to Earth: His sacrifice of unconditional love, to atone for human sin, extended to all people on Earth. Rejection is what Jesus sought to free us from. Therefore, what gives us the right to reject?

 

Ephesians 4:32 Via Pinterest

 

The Opposite of Rejection is Acceptance

Let’s be clear: acceptance does not mean being complicit with bad actors. In the biblical sense, acceptance is the act of treating others with love, forgiveness, and grace. How hard can it be? Well, look around you.

Throughout the world, we’ve declared our neighbors as our enemies. Division and discord have wrecked havoc on the social fabric of humanity. We do not know how to peacefully disagree with each other. We often resort to resolving conflict with violence. We truly need God’s help to accept each other, rather than rely on our tried-and-true tactics: pride, manipulation, and judgement.

This may seem futile, but nothing is impossible with God. When we lean into Him, we discover something remarkable about love: it is a powerful peacemaker, as it leads us to see others as inherently worthy. When we accept our neighbor, the boundary lines between “us” and “them” dissolve. True change and cooperation can occur. We naturally look for win-win moments.

I want to remind you of this verse: “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16). God gave us a free gift, born out of His love. A gift of mercy, signifying God’s compassion for our human condition. When Jesus died, the veil of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. This signified that Jesus’ death allowed direct access to God for all people.

In our relationships with others, we should try to extend love and mercy as well. Not because they have earned it, but because God says they deserve it. Let us follow Jesus’ teaching in giving without expectations, loving without conditions, and reaching out to the people who we are inclined to reject.

 

Via Pinterest

 

How to Treat Your Neighbor

Biblically, we can find many example examples of how to treat our neighbor. This is not an area that God allows us to second-guess in the Bible. It is made abundantly clear that we are to serve to honor and to love all of the people who we come into contact with. We are not to reject others based on appearance, behavior, or beliefs. God willing, we can learn to love each other first. The best verse on love I can point you to is 1 Corinthians 13:4. As for the fruits of the spirit –– love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control –– seek out Galatians 5:22.

 

God encourages us to:

• Be patient
• Be kind
• Be helpful to others
• Be gentle
• Be protective
• Be trusting
• Be hopeful
• Be perservering

God warns us:

• Do not envy your neighbor
• Don’t boast or brag
• Don’t consider yourself better than others
• Don’t dishonor others
• Don’t make it about yourself
• Don’t easily anger
• Don’t delight in evil

 

1 Peter 4:8 Via Pinterest

 

God Gives Us Grace

“My dear children, you belong to God”

1 John 4:4

 

Unfortunately, no human on Earth, except Jesus, can truly say that he or she is perfect. And as humans, we will always make mistakes. Yet we are loved, so truly deeply and authentically loved, just as we are. God does not reject us, but calls us to grow in relationship with Him.

Why then, would we deny our neighbor the same love that God gives us so freely? Perhaps, we’re afraid that we’re unloveable and worthy of rejection. Perhaps, we know love to be conditional, too.

The point of this article? You are not unloveable. God’s love is not conditional. If we are to love, let His love lead the way. Love thy neighbor, do not reject thy neighbor. In turn, you will be loved and accepted, too.

Love, Kim